In 17 words you have summarized the angst of humanity. Thank you!
Once we wake up, well, we first of all notice that there is an “I” (ego) that is in the way. Next, we begin to see that he or she is relentless and not very helpful.
Sort of like a 3 year old that never grows up, or a puppy. Have you ever had a puppy that grew up? Actually, that answer would have to be “no” because when you sign up for raising a dog, you must understand right off the bat that the dog may advance in years, but basically will always hold the heart and exuberance of a puppy. You can “domesticate” an animal, but you can't alter its core. It is like that with our ego self. Our ego self is only interested in maintaining the status-quo. This equilibrium was set when you were very young, and you didn't know any better.
Lets try, in 17 ways, to “get out of our own way”, and stay there.
- Take note of familiar emotional reactions when they occur.
- Pay attention to your thinking “this always happens to me”.
- Hone in on your physical response at such times.
- Is there a tightening, a heat rush, a rapid pulse? How do you feel?
- What do you do next at such moments?
- Is this response successful (do you get what you desire)?
- If you did, you wouldn't be reading this far!! Accept that its not working.
- Now – Resist.
- Resist the entitlement.
- Resist being right.
- Resist having an opinion about anyone else or any other action.
- Resist voicing judgment.
- Resist ridicule, insults, “knowing better”, “I told you so”, “you'll get yours”.
- Resist self pity, depression, feeling “justified” in your misery.
- Stop making excuses.
- See that NOTHING is worth losing your self love over. None of it matters.
- Allow the ego self to be absorbed. Let it in. Love it. Give it room to grow into the Heart Self. This is who you are, and once you show up here, nothing can get in your way.
It is not easy, but it is oh so worth it.