How do I know if i love myself?

“I do better with lists. Can you tell me the top 5 things that tell me if I'm loving myself with agape?
I'm a little fuzzy on what agape means for me.”

Well let's see... we are different in our personal expression of love so this might not be possible in the context of this page. There are books written explaining how each of us understands love. For some it is in the things we give and get, for others the words, still others the doing, etc...

Agape is unconditional love. It would be more beneficial perhaps to discuss what things (5 or more) you are doing that indicate you are NOT unconditionally loving yourself. We can start there.

• Cracking jokes about how you look, even in jest these indicate self-judgment
  
  
• Thinking you “screwed up again” when someone reacts negatively to you
  
  
• Insulting yourself when you look in the mirror or ___ (fill in the blank)
  
  
• Feeling “below” any person, institution, thing or prize
  
  
• Feeling not worthy of anything (person, situation, love, salary, living standard)
  
  
• Feeling unable to stand up for yourself
  
  
• Feeling emotional fear of any kind
  
  

That is more than 5 but you get the idea. If you love yourself, you hold yourself with respect. This means that you show care, honor, patience and compassion for all of your parts. It does not mean you exaggerate your worth, it means you know your worth.

We have been taught it is honorable, even saintly, to place all others before yourself. I tell you this is not true. The saints and greatest amongst us did not put everyone else before themselves, they placed themselves right where they belong, first. Then, with self confidence and authenticity, they moved out into the world with enough love and fortitude to give their gifts freely wherever they were called to do so. Their inner power was and is Agape.

Unconditional Self Love, or Agape, looks like that. It is quiet strength. It is pure light. It is where we all began and where we still are, if only we would remember.

I hope this answers your question.

Much love,
~Sophia