The most difficult to abandon may be blame. It used to fit in your back pocket; available to pull out at any moment. There’s no room for it in your new place. It is large, pointy and unwieldy; it won’t fit.
We are One. This idea is difficult to wrap your head completely around. It only works without judgment. Understand that judgment is not the same as opinion. There will always be people, attitudes, colors, foods, smells and activities you like more than others. You will prefer to “hang with” your favorites. That doesn’t mean the other colors, attitudes, people, foods, smells and activities are wrong. They are not. It is only that they are different than your favorites. Some things are just not your favorite. That’s okay. They are still perfectly acceptable. Easy to unravel when you think of it that way… It makes sense.
Now, think about the last time you were hurt, or any time when you were clearly and undeniably hurt, regardless of when. Stick to emotional hurts for this discussion. Put yourself there and remember the moment you felt wronged, misunderstood, mistreated, abused even. Sense the blame rise in you and feel your body react. Now, step away and watch. Notice how in that moment you’ve become powerless. This “other” has taken control of your world momentarily. You are surrounded in judgment and it feels intense. Is this a place you would choose to move into?
Lovingly and gently, tell yourself about the place you’d rather be. There are still opinions and favorites in this place, but they exist without judgment. You may be laughing there or you might by joking around and playing in this place, yet whatever you are doing, you are doing it consciously. There is no “wrong” terrible enough to take your power away. Nothing is worth your sovereignty. Blame is a dependent condition. You cannot be sovereign while believing it is real.
If you and I are One, than blame is an illusion; I am only accusing myself and pretending it’s you. Whatever righteous indignation I feel as a result won’t last and comes with a host of additional physical responses I’d rather avoid.
You’ll have to decide what you are willing to give up. It will come to a moment of truth. That’s what it takes to love without condition. It takes a release of finger pointing, judging, “tsk-ing”, complaining and blaming. Each of these is rooted in fear. Your new place only has room for Agape.
You may be immersed in habits of judgment and reasons for unhappiness. All habits can be changed, once you make the decision to do so.
Today you’ll have to choose how much your addiction to blame or judgment is worth. You can choose again, gradually, tenderly and lovingly. This is not about whose fault anything is, it’s about the creation of a new basis for your relationships and your life.
This place, the one we are entering, is based on unconditional love. It is inclusive. It is forgiving. It is like being embraced in complete acceptance.
This is the place of your most cherished dreams. The door is not locked. You can enter any time. Some of us are already there. Welcome home. We are the Ones we’ve been waiting for.
See you tomorrow.
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