Yes, you’ll have to lose something. This thing you’ve got a death grip on is yours alone. We can’t see or imagine it and you’ve never told a soul. So sure are you that it’s all you need to set things right, that you carry its image with you always.
It’s not a photograph. No, this is not a real life image. This is your IF image. IF I did this, IF I looked like this, IF I were this, IF I achieved this, IF I had this – then I’d love me. Then you’d love me. Then the world would love me. Enough.
Your IF image has been carefully crafted. It’s perfect down to the last detail. You’ve thought of everything. This way, you’ll know when you arrive. Oh, what a glorious day that’ll be!
You’ll pull out your IF image and compare it to the reflection in the mirror and smile, deeply satisfied. You’ll fall absolutely in love with yourself. No more questions, no hesitation, you are now worthy of love. And won’t the world come running to you then? You’ll be adored, accepted and undeniably ecstatic.
It doesn’t matter how long it takes you to reach your IF image – it’ll be worth the wait. You tell yourself this with each self criticism and dark thought. No worries – someday this will all be over. It’ll be perfect then, I’ll be perfect then.
Except that it won’t be, and you already are. It’s time to lose the excuse. This is life and you are creating it as you move along – that means each second holds the potential for brilliance or disaster. This never stops until you do.
You’ve been hanging onto a picture that’s not real; using it as an excuse to dislike yourself. Do you understand how this works? The self hatred that you feel will not change with more attention, money, fitness or success from the world outside. It’ll just be hidden more deeply.
Don’t stop desiring these things; desire fuels creation. Just stop loading up your manifestations with the weight of Agape. Agape is free and weightless and available today.
What you’ll have to give up is your IF image. It’ll be scary but it’s the only way. Love yourself anyway. Right now.
What you have to lose is the burden of self defined perfection. It doesn’t matter if you think your mother or your lover or your god will reject you once they discover the truth – it matters that you don’t reject you. Chances are good all of them suspect the truth anyway. All that you’ll be losing is the necessity to pretend. Let go of this ideal IF image. Love yourself right now.
A dear love of mine, Carmella, used to say “god doesn’t make junk” and “what you haven’t got, you don’t need”. She was right. Celebrate who you are today! There is nothing to lose worth saving, and a feast of Agape to be had.
You are the one you’ve been waiting for.
See you tomorrow.
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