Your personality is all that you see. It is all that I see when I look at you – your sex, demeanor, height, body type, clothing – these are the markers that define you for me.
Until we become friends. Then there are other categories to add to this list of you – only child, sister, single, married, artist, accountant, runner, or surfer.
This is the stuff of your personality, your ego; this is the you that we know you to be. It is not all of you, but the part the world sees. It represents decisions you’ve made.
If I decide to lift weights, I will look fit and muscular. If I love automobiles, mine will always be waxed and clean. If it is shoes that I love, well, you get the picture. We choose who we are in this world.
Our choices are often repetitive. They become how we define ourselves. “Oh, I love the gym.” “I don’t eat meat.” “I love football.” “I am a runner.”
We do what we love. Our actions support who we believe ourselves to be; in truth, who we have created ourselves to be.
It is the same with our emotions. When we were children, we formed opinions about things and had feelings about them. Certain people/events felt good or these people/events felt bad. As we matured, we adjusted them according to our current beliefs. Upon reaching adulthood, our personality was ingrained. How we were in the world was pretty much set.
In our Quest for Joy, we notice that happiness exists, yet it is temporary. The feelings of “no joy” show up again, and again. These are repetitive, we recognize them like old friends – although they are not friends we enjoy now. Self-defeat, loser, lonely, angry; they are emotional addictions and they can be changed.
The trick is to recognize them. If you run into an old friend you no longer wish to hang with – you can say hello and then walk away. You don’t need to kill him. He still gets to exist, just not in your world.
It’s the same with emotional decisions that no longer serve us. We just need to walk away. Rejection and denial won’t work, acceptance and absorption will.
These are decisions you made at one time. Maybe you were 8 or 13 or 16 years old. Gently let these parts of who you’ve been fade away. They are not who you are. Like old shoes, they no longer fit.
Addictions are part of our human condition. They are not wrong or bad or signs of weakness. This physical life is extremely addicting. This is how we function – we learn a response and then repeat it enough times until we no longer need to decide how to do it, we just do it.
It has become such a habit we’ve come to believe that’s just the way life is. We forgot that we are defining life, not the other way around. Our life is a collection of decisions we’ve made. Relationships, jobs and emotions are all choices.
It is an emotional decision to feel powerless or victimized or worthless; it is not truth. Once we recognize the choices we’ve made we can change them.
There is no blame, all is choice. We’ve been raised to believe our “failings” were “weaknesses”. They are habits. They are not who we are.
We are collectively waking up. You are waking up. You can see the personality, the ego self you’ve created, for who he or she is. Is she who you want to be? Is he everything you’ve dreamed of? If your answer is no, then recognize what is stopping you. See the choices you’ve made that no longer serve you and choose again, without blame. Self-hatred is not necessary. We can love ourselves now. It’s okay.
We are not bad, and suffering is not necessary. Right now we can engage joy. Today we can realize our perfection.
Accept all you have ever been and decide all you’d like to be. Recognize that emotion (the one that prevents joy) when it shows up, and walk away. Destruction is not necessary, just quiet determination.
What is at stake is perpetual joy. What is at stake is you. Not the personality you have believed yourself to be, but you – the eternal being of love that understands your unlimited potential.
You are the one you are waiting for.
Feeling separate – anger, winning, victimization – all (are) ego constructs to isolate us and the trick is to know they are ego created and to run them for as long as you desire, release them, and move on.
Moving on is most easily accomplished through love.
Love is recognized when there is no discomfort, no hesitation about the correctness of what has occurred. It will feel right all the way through to your toes.
You will know when you do it. You have no experience, yet, at running your ego. It is that space, that love, that unconditional love that will guide you.
By now you have come to know that creation is something you do. Thoughts, words, feelings and actions; all have creative power in our lives.
It sounds so easy – just think about what you want and it will eventually manifest; the law of attraction. It is the thinking that is key, and what are you thinking? You are thinking constantly; this is why we sleep, to escape the incessant noise in our heads.
To direct that noise is what we are looking to do. To master creation is to be aware of yourself, the one who is choosing the thoughts he or she thinks;to choose on purpose which thoughts support your desires and which thoughts “shoot yourself in the foot” and cause you to stumble.
The secret and the thing to understand about thoughts, feelings and habits of emotion is that they are addictive. They are every bit as addictive as heroin, and depending on your goals, as destructive.
I have recently seen one of my favorite addictions, sadness, for what it truly is – a habitual compulsion that I love. Now, my current mindset and goal is joy. Sadness sort of trips that up.
Yesterday I watched myself inject numerous hits of sadness, too many to count. It was glorious! My tool was the radio, which is awash with songs of loss and longing. I loved it! Over and over I changed the channel, heard a new song and within seconds was deep into a recollection of lost love. I played out the love part and then re-lived the longing over and over again. I never ran out of songs, people, situations or memories of pain.
I knew this did not serve my current perspective. I thought “No!” and changed stations, finding a more cheerful tune. Inevitably the next song evoked some painful memory and I was once again feeling that seductive hurt.
Now these people I was remembering are either dead or from so far back in my past that they may as well be. I finally saw how crazy this was. My life today is actually saturated with love; this made no sense to me. I turned off the radio.
I see now how deep my own addiction is. It trips me up constantly on my road to happiness. It sounds nuts, yet, there it is. What halts our progress is buried so deep we have trouble finding it. Yet the familiar feeling is instantly recognized.
If you do not love your life right now, then chances are there is an addiction that is at cause. It is our human condition to feel bad about ourselves. We expect it and will actually think poorly of each other for appearing arrogant, full of ourselves or “holier than thou”. What’s with that anyway?
Your feelings of low self worth are merely choices you have made from the options available to you at the time. There is no need to analyze them, just make new choices.
These habits are addictive. Relentless awareness coupled with conscious choice is imperative. You are now looking for sustained happiness. These addictions no longer serve you.
First you must recognize yours. They could be sad, angry, low self worth or just feeling bad about you. Once seen, which is huge, just watch how it is everywhere. Identify the tenacity of this emotion, and understand how much of a part it plays in your life; in your moment to moment decisions.
Resolve to change and you will. Your life has no choice other than to do what it is you expect it to. You have begun now to go beneath the cosmetic changes and create long lasting joy. You are brave, brilliant and bound for glory. See it and fearlessly work for it. This is why you came.
You are the one you are waiting for.
Once you become clear on your intent, it gets easier to see which emotions and actions serve you. The indicator for you is which feel good and which doesn't.
There is no other who can tell you that - it is up to you alone and known by you alone.
As the clarity of who you are becomes closer and closer to truth - there will be only strength in your convictions. Trust that and feel the power of you, watch as your light grows ever stronger. That is love and it is what you are.
If there is ever to be a shift in our collective hearts, it has to begin here, in your single heart; for we operate as one and each thread in this fabric of creation is woven together perfectly for maximum strength and beauty.
It all matters. Every thought that runs through you can support you. Notice what depletes you and on faith alone, let it go.
Love supports you. Every time. You, who have lived through all that has happened, are love. You are perfect. You have been waiting for someone to believe in; you are here.
You are here, to experience yourself. In order to do that, you relate to me, to your family, to your neighbors, to your friends, to your lovers. In these relationships, you will feel every possibility; pain, pleasure, fear, sadness, joy, fun, challenge, hope.
Sometimes it is you who will initiate the dialogue/event, sometimes it is the “other” who starts things up. It doesn’t matter where or how it begins, what matters is how you experience it. You will define what it means, for YOU. This life is YOU, experiencing yourself.
Jealousy, annoyance, fear, exhaustion - all are functions of the body and of your emotional self (ego) whose only purpose is to keep you solidly, perfectly, HERE in this third dimension. They are tools you've used for your entire life and they have served their purpose. It is time to let them go.
Listen to your body when it tells you it needs rest or what it needs in the way of sustenance, but don't listen to your emotions.
They are reactions, or better said, creations of your ego self so that you can remain in a a very dense 3D physical form.